Slight update: someone saw this and asked on the Pentax Discuss Mailing List if it was genuine...
Pentax Releases a New Camera!
Following much speculation on the Pentax-Discuss Mailing list, an official announcement was made today by the official TOTLPP Development team spokeperson, a Mr E. A. Presley.
Metering
The new model has improved metering, OTF, TTL, Spt, CW, Matrix, 3D and the revolutionary new DWIMC (do what I mean, correctly) which will be smug and correct the users mistakes.
Autofocus
The AF has been improved with multiple sensors, a configurable patterns and a database of attractive subject types and situations. It will also learn as you use it. It will be possible to train the camera to never focus on your mother-in-law, for example.
The AF is also equipped with low power tractor beams to rearrange the subjects in the viewfinder with gentle prods to inprove composition.
Flash
The on camera flash now not only pops up, but can be detached and has a handy clip for remote attachement. It is triggered by a short range infra-red remote with a range of a meter or so. This is intended to be worn atop the photographers hat, for example. The hot-shoe on the camera body is nominally in the same position as on the PZ-1p, but it can be move around to a few other locations with one of the built in functions.
Future revisions will possess the ability to hover discretely over the photographer.
Lens Compatibility
The Lens mount has been changed, but don't worry, it's *still* completely compatible with all existing K-Mount lenses, both manual and autofocus. Adapters have been developed to allow the use of the existing 645 and 67 Medium Format lens systems. It will also take Nikon and Canon lenses with the adapters supplied.
"Let's see people complain about renting equipment now", said the spokesman.
Manual format lenses can be autofocused with the aid of the optional MotorizedRollerSkates™, although some amount of open space is required. This same accessories allows for the new PrimeZoom™, whereby fixed focal length lenses are turned into zoom lenses without the user having to walk.
User Customization
The existing Pentax Functions which allow the user to customise the camera have been retained and extended to allow complete control of the camera. Of particular note are those functions which allow the user to change the colouring of the case (thanks to the unique LCD coating). Some themes are included, including ProBlack, Silver, UrbanCamo™.
Shutter
As the shutter is now completely silent, a selection of recorded shutter sounds have been included. The user can choose between ClassicLX™, NoisyPZ™, QuietMZ™ and F5UserShowingOff™, which simulates 10fps for 3.6 seconds and then shouts "Reload!".
Winder
The winder mechanism also incorporates a refrigerated film store and can hold up to ten rolls of film. It can also automatically reload. Used film is stored in a similar container. There will be an optional E6 processing module for the used film container.
Market Research
After extensive market research, Asahi Optical Corp have realised that Professional Photographers actually *want* a camera the size of an F5 or Eos 1(Rsn GTi Turbo), so the TOTLPP will have extra compartment to add to the size. A optional beer cooler is available.
Initial Release Date is April 1, 2000 at the Ulan Bator International Camera Show.
"Thank y'all ver' much", concluded the spokesman, "Y'all been a lovely audience."